liekinloimu | Recent Entries

Thank you for being the awesome person that is writing for me. I’m Liekinloimu at AO3 and I can’t wait to see what kind of story you will cook up!

I’d love to receive a fic from any of the fandoms I requested. Whatever prompt you feel comfortable with, go with it. I love fics that delve deep in interpersonal relationships, but I also love daring adventures, clever mysteries and humor. I love drama, hurt/comfort and angst with a happy ending. I’m a huge fan of slash and I also love kinky bdsm erotica.

Considering the canon material of some my requested fandoms, I’d like to state that I have no problems with the following topics to be included if so needed: graphic violence, minor character death, torture (as long as it’s not for titillation), dubcon, noncon/rape (again, as long as it’s not for titillation).

General likes:

Happy endings
Slash
Polyamory/threesomes/moresomes
Canon divergence
Angst
Hurt/Comfort
BDSM: most things work for me as long as they are consensual. I especially like: power play, humiliation, dirty talk, pain play, toys, bondage, breath play.

General Do-Not-Wants:

Character death of the requested character(s)/protagonists. All other characters are fair game.
On-screen child abuse. Mentions of it or discussions of past abuse are ok.
Mpreg
AUs with totally different setting from the canon (coffeeshop, space etc.). Canon divergent AUs are fine.
On-screen under-16 Underage that is any sex act above kissing.
Genderswap.
Terminal illness of the requested character(s).

Sex specific Do-Not-Wants:

daddy/mommy kink
ageplay
scat
bestiality (concerning any creatures that cannot give verbal consent)
any kink/fetish/paraphilia that causes permanent physical or mental damage to one party

The Legend of Drizzt Series - R. A. Salvatore

Drizzt Do’Urden, Jarlaxle Baenre, Artemis Entreri

Drizzt Do'Urden & Artemis Entreri

I’d love to have any interaction between the requested characters, be it as friends, enemies or lovers. Are they in Menzoberranzan? On the surface? In the middle of a fight? Having a threesome? I have no specific prompts or preferences to give on this one.

Canon specific DNWs: Het relationships of the requested characters.

Modesty Blaise - Peter O'Donnell

Modesty Blaise, Willie Garvin

Modesty Blaise & Willie Garvin by Romeo

My wish here is for Modesty Blaise & Willie Garvin. I have always loved the relationship Modesty and Willie have. It’s so incredibly close, with deeper feelings than most lovers have, yet there’s nothing sexual in it, which somehow makes it even more meaningful. So I would love to have something that dives into that. Angst and Hurt/Comfort are totally ok – after all, it’s already shown in the books that they both basically lose themselves if they think the other has died – just as long as there is the comfort -part in the end.

Canon specific DNWs: sexual or romantic relationship between the requested characters. Angst with no happy ending.

12th Century CE English Royalty RPF

John I of England

I’m pretty much enthralled with the complex character of John Plantagenet and would love something where he is the central character.

John was ambitious and clever, a pragmatist (when his temper did not override that), and most probably an atheist (at a time when such was practically a taboo). He was genial, witty, generous and hospitable, yet also jealous, petty, over-sensitive and suspicious. He was prone to fits of anger, held grudges and could be terribly cruel when situation arose. He loved reading and music, but also gambling and wine. He was infamous for his sexual affairs with women (and with married ones at that, the horror), yet he loved his children and his second wife (whom he scandalously married when she was only about 12 - although the scandal had nothing to do with her age or actions), and likely stayed mostly faithful to her until his death. He was known for officially recognizing also all his illegitimate offspring.

John loved and was loyal to his father king Henry III, yet betrayed him right before Henry’s death to join his brother Richard (the Lionheart). He didn’t get along with his brothers, especially so with Richard, whom he was envious of, yet he was quite close to his half-brother William Longsword, a bastard son of king Henry, who long remained loyal to John (but who, since karma is a bitch, betrayed John right before John’s death). John’s relationship with his mother Eleanor was complicated, a mixture of love and hate and bitterness, and probably some other emotions mashed up there too. As a king he was neither a very good nor a very bad, but rather a hardworking one.

So yeah, it would be awesome if you could write something that reflected on his relationship with either Eleanor or Richard or possibly Will Longsword, or maybe on his thoughts when he betrayed Henry, but really mostly anything is fine. I’d prefer the fic being set during the time before he became the king of England.

Canon specific DNWs: John being flattened to a one-dimensional villain of the Robin Hood -variety

These were originally several different posts in my tumblr around 2013. I compiled them here together.

The first post. I was feeling pretty frustrated while writing it, so it wasn't very politely worded. Apologies for that

I know I’m not the first and neither will I be the last to say this, but please, fanfic writers: IF YOU ARE WRITING FILI AND KILI DURING THE QUEST OR AN AU AFTER THE QUEST, PLEASE MAKE THEM ACT THEIR AGE, WHICH IS SOMETHING LIKE 26…28 YEARS OLD. THANK YOU.

Sorry for shouting, but it’s annoying reading them act as petulant and irresponsible teenagers (unless the story in question actually states that they are teenagers). Fili and Kili may do a prank or two, and have fun, but they also know when it’s time to be serious, when to be responsible and when to do a job if there is job to be done. And they are heirs to a throne, which means they have a pretty good upbringing and probably have quite a good knowledge of the administrational side of ruling as well as a practical view of how the world really works (since they have grown up amongst their people, not shielded in a palace). And Kili may be younger, but in human years he is only two or three years younger than Fili, which is not much of a difference at all when one is nearing 30.

I’ll go back to my little hiding corner now. Thank you for listening.

The second post. I got a question concerning my first post

luciferousbagofdicks asked:

"I'm sorry, I just need to get this info, because I've found it nowhere but in word of mouth. You said in a recent response to an ask that Tolkien stated Dwarves are considered adults at age 40. Where precisely did he say this? Because it's not in any of the books I own so far as I remember."

My answer:

No need to be sorry. Tolkien wasn’t as talkative of dwarves as he was of elves, so it takes some digging to find the stuff on them.

I had to do some checking myself. So Tolkien hasn’t clearly stated that 40 years line (as I said in earlier post - my mistake, sorry for that). Actually, the 40 years maturity line seems to be a rough estimate based on couple of mentions of Dain:

“Dwarves on average live to be 250 years of age. A 30 year old Dwarf is very much considered a young stripling, having not yet reached full adulthood. Thus it was considered very remarkable when the young Dain Ironfoot slew Azog the Orc chieftain of Moria, at only 32 years old. Once a Dwarf has reached maturity, he will stop aging almost entirely, remaining in prime physical condition, or perhaps middle-aged at the most, for over two centuries. However, when Dwarves reach 240 years old, they will begin to age very rapidly and their physical condition drastically worsen, essentially condensing the aging process that Men experience from 40 to 80 years of age into only ten years. It is not, however, unheard of for an elderly Dwarf to live beyond 250 years. ”

This is from Tolkien Gateway (http://tolkiengateway.net/wiki/Dwarves) which states the reference as follows: J.R.R. Tolkien, Christopher Tolkien (ed.), The War of the Jewels, “Part Two. The Later Quenta Silmarillion: Concerning the Dwarves (Chapter 13)”

Then the stuff below is taken from Wikipedia (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/D%C3%A1in_II_Ironfoot), which states the reference to be “Tolkien, The Peoples of Middle Earth, p. 284”:

“Dáin’s father, Náin, was killed by the great Orc Azog during the Battle of Nanduhirion before the gates of Moria, the culmination of the War of the Dwarves and Orcs. Dáin avenged Náin, slaying Azog in single combat. He was a very young Dwarf at the time (only 32, roughly when Dwarves reach maturity, or "battle-readiness”)“

I don’t have these books myself, so I can’t check the original sources at the moment.

The third post. I got some anonymous comments and answered them

Anon 1: "Average lifespan of the line of Durin is 340 years. That's where your calculations are off"

My answer:

When you compare and calculate ages between humans and dwarves, you have to compare the average age of humans and the average age of DWARVES AS A RACE, not the average age of an individual family branch. The dwarves in Durin line just happen to die a lot older than dwarves in general, just like Aragorn’s line lives longer than humans in general. However, even if calculating with the age you gave, we’ll never get Fili and Kili to be as young as 18/19 as long as the maturing age of dwarves is around 40.

Anon 2: "Actually a great number of people have done the math and they are around 18/19, not in their late twenties in human years. Only one site I've seen has had that older guesstimate, however almost every last other one, using very sound methods, have come up with the number 18/19"

My answer:

“A great number of people” and unreferenced “sites” aren’t a very good arguing point. A great number of people can still be wrong if they don’t know that dwarves age differently from men. The 18/19 is what you get if you assume that dwarves age exactly like men, which is not the case. This site has a very good formula for calculating dwarf ages with principles based on what we can dig from Tolkien’s works: http://axebow.lcwsites.net/archive/0/comparativeages.html

The end result differs slightly based on what one assumes to be the maturing age and the average age of humans and dwarves in Middle Earth. But you never get Fili and Kili to be so young as 18/19 if you regard the fact that dwarves mature somewhere around 40 years of age. Check my earlier answer to luciferousbagofdicks (the second post) to get the Tolkien references regarding the maturing age.

(Originally posted in my tumblr)

I ran into this phenomenon called “waist training”, which apparently is some kind of fashion on the American side of the Atlantic. Not following Hollywood celebrities or reading fashion magazines I’ve totally not come across this before. Let me tell you: the idea behind “waist training” (the way it is advertised) is about as sensible as “sauna-belt” (which seriously made me laugh out loud when I first came across that idiocy).

See, I have a corset. A custom-made steel boned corset. So I know something about how they work (And I’m Finnish, which is basically equal to having a sauna. Which I use several times a week. If sauna was something that made you lose weight, boy would we Finnish people be thin. I’ll give you a hint: we aren’t. Not any more than an average European. Maybe even less.)

A corset (or a waist cincher which is what these companies really are marketing) is just a piece of clothing. Yes, while wearing it your waist is smaller. No, it doesn’t stay smaller when you take the garment off. You can’t “train” your waist, the only way to truly train your waist is to lose fat.

And the only way a corset helps you to lose fat is if it helps you eat less in quantity and more in quality foods than you would otherwise. To help with that, it means it has to be comfortable enough for you to wear it all day long. And with comfortable I mean that it doesn’t hurt and that you can eat enough to not feel like you are starving. Small steps, people. That’s the only way to lose weight permanently.

You don’t do exercise with it. Why would you? I don’t mean you can’t, but really, why? It only hinders your workout. It makes it difficult for you to make your exercises properly, which increases the risk of injury. You can’t really train your core muscles. It shallows your breathing, which means your body doesn’t get enough oxygen, which means your body is unable to burn you fuel for the exercise the way it should. Yes, it might make you sweat more, but sweat is just water and salts, that’s all. If you have a weight problem, water is not the one causing it.

Oh, why do I wear a corset? It’s comfortable. It makes me feel good. It helps me keep my back straight, so my neck muscles don’t tense as much and I don’t get as many headaches as I used to. I eat more healthily. And since I use overbust corset I don’t need bra, which means no bra-straps, oh joy!

Hmh. I’ll just go drink some water for now.

*end rant*

(Originally posted in my tumblr. Slightly edited.)

I know that when I made the choice of reading slash fiction, my choice was to read something that is not always the greatest stronghold for feminism. Despite the fact that this branch of literature is mainly written by women, it’s focus is in men and their relationships – and it shows in the attitudes.

It bothers me that even in very good fics by authors that I actually know support women’s emancipation, there can be found these undercurrents planted by the patriarchate way of thinking. Every time one of the protagonists jokingly comments something along the lines “if I had a daughter, they wouldn’t be allowed to date before they turned thirty” or threatens their daughter’s potential boyfriend with shotgun (or refers to a shotgun in this issue), it makes me cringe.

If the character spewing these things comes from the kind of circumstances where this kind of thinking is seen as normal for the character, I can grudgingly accept it (like for example in Brokeback Mountain fics – both the era and the region the characters come from support that kind of thinking), but when it’s said by otherwise pretty forward thinking characters in modern times, it just makes me grind my teeth. I know most of the time it’s supposed to be a “joke”, but unfortunately the subconscious thought behind these kinds of jokes is that a) women can’t take care of themselves, b) they are more or less the property of their father, and c) that women – especially young women – should not be having sex because it “ruins” them – and thus all boyfriends are bad.

Let’s tackle these. Yes, obviously women are physically weaker than men (in general). But where comes the idea that women need protection? Wouldn’t it be more productive of the fathers to teach us to protect ourselves, as well as to teach men to respect women? Because really, the ground issue here are those men that do not respect women – who see women as something less valuable than them, or maybe something not really human at all – who see us as things, or pets or something else they are entitled to by simply existing (this really baffles my mind, how can anybody think they are entitled to “have” another person?)

At a time when mostly everybody in the western world has pretty easy access to some kind of contraceptives, it just sounds idiotic to me that women couldn’t acceptably have sex just as often, as young and with as many partners as men do. I know my growth environment has given me a very “liberal” views on this subject – quite many of my female classmates had some kind of consensual sex for the first time between ages 11…15 (yes, their boyfriends were mostly of the same age as them). I had sex the first time when I was sixteen. And for clarification, by sex I mean any kind of activity by another person that happens between your (or their) legs by mutual acceptance – I refuse to talk about “virginity”, which is an archaic and medieval concept and doesn’t define a damn thing.

I’m not saying I would want anybody (either boys or girls) have sex as early as some of my classmates did, it’s better for your psyche to wait that both you and your partner are emotionally a bit more mature (I’d say at least 16..18). Also, it’s better to have a stable relationship before plunging in to your first time. But the rules in my mind are the same to both girls and boys. If anything, considering that boys generally mature more slowly than girls, they should be a bit older than their female peers when starting their sex life.

I know we (slash writers) like to write about men, because – well – the more men the hotter it gets. And considering that female characters are the underdog from the start – there are (usually) a lot less female than male characters, and they have (often) less significance – this leads to the situation where women characters sometimes become totally insignificant.

Internalized misogyny and subtle antifeminism are actually pretty serious problem in (slash) fanfics – there are a lot of female characters that get undeserved hate that would not be there if they were men – mainly their crime is being the current/ex-girlfriend/wife of one of the leading male characters. Let’s see the ones that first come to mind from my fandoms… Melanie and Lindsey (QAF), Keller (SGA), any girlfriend (the Covenant), any girlfriend of Sam and Dean’s that stays longer than one episode (Supernatural), Tauriel (the Hobbit), the ex-wives (Brokeback Mountain), Tonks (Harry Potter), Kate Argent (Teen Wolf). Yes, I know Kate Argent is a canonical bitch of the first order, but she gets more hate than Voldemort and Sauron together, and I’m sure she wouldn’t be so universally hated if she was (a good looking) male.

Not to mention how easily women can be totally erased from existence in A/B/O –fics. That would really require it's own separate post.

So could we, as writers and readers, to remember that female characters have a right to their existence without being vilified, and the right to be treated equally to male characters? And could we spare a thought to whether we really want to write/read stuff that more or less subtly gives support to the archaic patriarchate beliefs and rape culture? I’m not saying we shouldn’t write about these issues at all, but we should think whether our writing gives the air of accepting those things or whether we are handling them as actual problematic matters in society.

(This whole rant sprang from one asshattery comment uttered by John Sheppard in an unnamed SGA fanfic.)

(Originally posted on my tumblr. Edited slightly, since I've hopefully grown as a person since)

I’ve been wondering about prominent original characters in fanfiction (minor OC’s don’t really matter one way or another). Why do they sometimes work so well, but at other times make the reader run to the opposite direction and fast? Of course, most people are not all that happy reading the (yet another set of) adventures of a (badly masked) writer self-insert, but I’ve noticed that an OC does not necessarily have to be badly written to make me feel uncomfortable. Sometimes OC’s that I think would work just fine in original fiction, feel really off and repulsive in fanfiction. Example: there was one story where there were several prominent OC’s that were well developed. However, they were dropped in the story almost at the beginning and they had equal weight to the canon characters of the story while yet not having much interaction with the CC’s. While I’m sure this would have worked well if all the characters were OC’s, in fanfic I found the OC portion of the story irritating and disruptive.

Let’s start from the basics. Why do I come to read fanfiction? Well, obviously I want to read about the whatever universe and characters I’m the fan of. And now, If the first thing (or even the second) that the writer does in fic, is to drop an OC with a prominent role in the fic on my lap, I tend to feel cheated; I came because I wanted more depth on the canon characters and their interactions, not to read about an OC that I know nothing about.

What I have noticed about OC’s that I have liked, is that they are usually presented gradually to the reader. Either they come by first having only some interaction with the canon characters with slowly increasing their prominence, or they start as observers (POV being the OC’s) and again the amount of their own actions and interactions with the canon characters increase gradually as the reader gets to know the OC.

The art of writing OC’s is difficult, and I’ve yet to meet an author that I feel would always succeed with them. Like, I have an author A that writes amazingly good kid OC’s – I’m not a fan of kid fics in general, but I have nothing against them either – but her adult OC’s tend to feel hollow. Then I have author B, who writes amazingly good adult OC’s, but her kid OC’s tend to feel - well, I guess unrealistic is the best word.

(Of course, kids can be pretty difficult to write be they CC’s or OC’s. Even if you sometimes can get away with the fact that kids are all very different and at different maturity levels at the same age, there is a limit after which it just becomes unconvincing. I have this very talented author C, who had a very good fic with a not-main-CC kid, who continuously acted at least three years younger than his proclaimed age which was somewhat distracting.)

Some writers use recurring OC’s in their fics, and that’s when the reader can get so used to them that they slowly rise to the interest level of canon characters. One example is Ron Rosenblum in Gaedhal’s QaF fics – even though I hate the character with a passion (he is a sleazy figure at best), there is no denying that he works very well in her fics and does not feel like an OC at all. Then there are Keira Marcos’ recurring SGA OC’s that feel as real and important as the canon characters.

I guess the heart of the matter is that it takes time for the reader to get to know any character, and because in fanfiction the reader already knows the canon characters intimately, original characters have severe minus points when they are first featured compared to the CC’s. And thus if the author makes the mistake of not taking time to slowly assimilate their OC’s in the story, the suddenness of the OC appearance and too much “screen time” at once can alienate the reader from the character from the start.

(Originally posted in my tumblr)

The funny thing about writing to a super-small-almost-dead fandom is that even if you publish your work, you are basically still writing just to yourself. Which only goes to show that sometimes one just needs to write things, even knowing there is hardly anybody else interested in reading it.

(Originally posted in my tumblr)

1. Leaving several grammar mistakes in the summary. Who would want to read a story if it’s obvious that the writer has not checked even the short summary for mistakes? I really don’t want to know what the actual story would look like (shudders).

2. Not having a summary at all. Why would anyone read a story if they have no idea what it is about? If it is a small fandom with limited amount of stories, I personally might eventually get desperate enough to open the fic but otherwise, no.

3. Apologizing in advance that the fic might be crappy/have serious mistakes etc. I actually get why an unsure writer would want to do that, but really, why would I even start to read something that I’m warned in advance might be waste of my time? The warning will only give the reader a negative vibe before they’ve read even a word of the actual story. And if I think the fic is shitty, I’m not going to read it to the end anyway. If the writer really feels they need to apologize for their fic, they should put it in the end notes where it won’t influence the reader beforehand.

4. Using text-speak shortenings or for example continuously “&” instead of “and” in the summary. I ran into a fic with the &-problem, and my eyes started to bleed before I even got to the end of the summary.

5. Not using tags. Seriously, half the time tags tell me more about the story than the summary. Reading a story without tags is like diving into water without knowing either its temperature or whether there’ll be rocks under the surface. I’ve met fandoms where this problem was practically an epidemic.

6. Not using commas. It’s just so difficult to read if you have no commas anywhere. A couple of paragraphs of that torture are quite enough at least for me, thank you.

7. Having grammar mistakes in every other sentence. Everybody makes mistakes, it’s not a problem if there are a few here or there. But continuous mistakes all the time take the enjoyment out of the story. There usually exists grammar correction in most word processors that can be used, if having betas is not possible.

8. Not tagging triggering issues. I might read that one fic, but if the writer refuses to tag, I’m not going to read another one from them. I’m not even triggered that easily, but I like to have advanced warning for example about rape, abuse, dubious consent and major character deaths. If these things spring up unexpectedly, they tend to make me feel really ill. Sometimes it might take days or even weeks before I can stop thinking the upsetting stuff every time I close my eyes. In one, unfortunately memorable case, the summary and tags together were enough to trigger weeks long nausea – I don’t even want to know how I would have felt if I unsuspectfully had actually read the fic in question.

9. Totally disregarding human psychology. For example, if a character has been severely sexually abused for a long time, everything is not going to be all hearts and roses after the one right person comes along and has sex with them. It might be ok in a short porn fic or crack, but don’t write a long serious story with such unbelievable personality holes in it.

10. Using too many tags. This is more an annoyance than a problem, but if the tag list is boring and longer than Rapunzel’s hair, I’ll probably just skip the whole story. Not everything needs to be tagged, people! Meaning foods consumed, furniture, the profession of every meaningless side character etc. The tags tell not only about the story, but also of the writer. Lot of funny tags is positive. Lot of boring and unessential tags is negative. This is also an epidemic-kind of thing in some fandoms (and they certainly are not the same fandoms with the non-tagging problem, by the way).

Since I have not really been using my LiveJournal account too much, I've stayed there even when a lot of fans and fandoms have fled to other platforms. LJ's latest clusterfuck of putting their TOS basically under Russian legislation was where my patience ended. I'm not going to censor myself or follow the bigoted, misogynistic and dictatorial laws of Russia. It's enough that I have all my life been living a few hundred kilometers from it's borders, always remembering that our giant and unstable neighbor is there, waiting.

No matter the name of the nation, be it Soviet Union or Russia, to us it's like constantly seeing a major storm cloud just in the corner of our eye. I kind of get how the Gondorians felt, living next to Mordor (btw sorry for the insinuation if you happen to be a Russian*). My grandparents fought the Soviets to keep our independence, and I fear someday we'll again be fighting the Russians. I will not live under Russian* rule, ever, not even on a blogging platform.

*I'd like to point out I have nothing against the Russians as people, but as a nation Russia has been unreliable and unstable for the last few hundred years, and there is no end in sight. (Not that the US is much better at the moment, but at least they are not our neighbors.)

(Originally posted on my tumblr)

Recently when I was writing I suddenly started wondering about my many fandoms and ships – were there some I wouldn’t even try to write?

I mean, I’ve been kind of hopping between my SGA story and Hobbit stuff and then I have this little piece of weird dark porn Hobbit/Being Human cross-over nobody asked for and probably doesn’t want to read, and then there is this long-ass Covenant story I have bits and pieces of but it’s a mess which is why I’m not writing it (not that it would have much readers either). And I kind of would like to write something in QAF because Brian is such a many-faceted character that he would be a joy to write – I actually did a snippet, but there’s the problem that I’ve forgotten too much of the canon QAF stuff. I’m probably going to write some Nagron at some point too.

So when I started thinking, I realized there are three fandoms I’ve had ships in that I’ll probably never touch: Brokeback Mountain, Supernatural and Teen Wolf. Although TW is kind of on the brink – if I ever figure out how to channel Stiles, I’d probably go for it. Supernatural is this big bag of insanity I want to steer clear from and I just can’t see myself writing RPS either – I read it just fine, but the idea of writing it myself somehow creeps me out. With BBM – I just wouldn’t know what to write. My imagination needs a healthy dose of fantasy and sci-fi to work, and it has neither – also, I have this thing with Jack that his worse characteristics are too close to mine for comfort. I don’t always like him for the same reasons I don’t always like myself.

(Originally posted in my tumblr)

Recently when I was writing I suddenly started wondering about my many fandoms and ships – were there some I wouldn’t even try to write?

One problem from suffering of long-term depression/anxiety disorders is that your ability to give a fuck decreases out of existence.
(Even if it is caused by your yet undiagnosed ADD)

(Originally posted in my tumblr)

Teen wolf is probably the kinkiest fandom I’ve ever read fic in. Seriously, none of the others can hold a candle to it, not even the SPN fandom. There are probably some pretty rare very questionable kinks that can’t be found in TW fics, but mostly everything is a fair game there. Sometimes it’s good. Sometimes it’s bad.

Also, I never thought there could be a tentacle fic that I would be able to take seriously, but TW managed that too. It’s a goddamned weird fandom, especially as in my opinion the fan produced stuff is generally of a much greater quality than the (occasionally very abysmal) original source material.

…I never realized until yesterday how relaxing it can be writing from the POV of a person who is actually honest with himself and his feelings. Seriously, most characters lie to themselves all the time about something.

(Originally posted in my tumblr)

1. Step 0: The start of this goes actually back a looong way before I’d even heard of fandoms. I was a teenager and read “The Vampire Lestat” by Anne Rice and was like “wow, two guys loving each other is sooo hot”. Had I known about shipping then, I would have shipped Lestat and Louis like crazy. That book changed so much for me in other ways too. It’s one of the three books I’ve read that have had a life changing effect on me.

2. Step 1: It was around 2002 when I finally decided to see what all the fuss about Harry Potter was. I’d seen the movie, which I thought was pretty good, but I had been avoiding the books like plague, since I tend to have a reverse reaction when masses of people start liking something. Needless to say I was hooked at the first chapter. I went through the existing four books like the starving young lady I was, but I was left wanting for more. Especially more Sirius. So I roamed in the web for Harry Potter stuff and came across fanart of Sirius and Remus kissing. I was like “whoah, what the hell?”, stared at it for a bit and thought “that actually fits!”. So in a span of two minutes I went from Sirius and Remus being best friends to Sirius and Remus being madly in love.

3. Step 3: So now I craved more Sirius/Remus stuff. I came across fanfiction. Not that I had never read fanfiction before, I just didn’t know it was called that, or the extent of it in internet. After the first one I was a goner.

4. Scroll three years forward: Brokeback Mountain came out. Almost in one night a puppyshipper was transformed into a huge BBM fan. It was so relaxing for a change to ship something that was canon, and be in a fandom without shipping wars or someone constantly questioning your ship. Also, in average the fics were better and more mature, probably because the average age of the fans was a lot higher than in the Wolfstar ship.

5. Scroll again a couple of years forward: By accident I came across references to Brian and Justin. And a video of some seriously scorching hot fucking. I just had to find out what this show was, because that was basically porn in a damn tv show! I found out they’d actually shown QAF in Finland, but under such a ridiculous translated name that I’d never even thought of checking out the show. I ended up owning all five seasons of Queer as Folk, and shipping Brian and Justin just as crazily as my former pairings. Again, it was kind of a relief to ship a paring where NONE of the characters died in canon.

6. Scroll forward some more: I came across, again in the internet, a show called Supernatural. I think I actually found it through the J2 RPS-paring, reading some pretty good J2 fic and wanting to find out who these guys were and where they came from. I fell again. This time I dived fully in the RPS-paring, which I’d always before thought as a small random guilty pleasure in the closet. And shamefully I ended up shipping Wincest on the side. Although, when considering the stuff going on in the show, incest really didn’t seem like much an issue.

7. Again scroll forward: For several reasons, some of them unknown to even me, I fell out of fandom. For maybe year and a half I didn’t read fics or had much contact in the fandom in general.

8. And my depression renewed. Which in my case means I need fics and porn like air to survive. I came back to J2 where I left from, but found there was not all that much new good stuff. Mostly fics seemed kind of repetitive, and the Wincest part had slowed down in the wake of Castiel, whom I’m not much a fan of (I love Misha Collins, but Castiel is still an annoying character). I really needed a new pairing to dust the cobwebs from my brain, but I don’t fall in love with just anything. There was a serious void there.

9. The Hobbit movie comes out. I delayed more than a month before going to see it, but finally found some time. I’ve been a Tolkien fan over two decades, and Lord of the Rings was one of those life changing books I mentioned earlier. I also loved the Jackson movies (except on the case of Faramir, but let’s not go into that here), even if they differed somewhat from the source material. So I went into the theater and Kili comes on screen and… whumps, I’m in love! Yes, I loved Fili and Kili already in the books, but Aidan Turner (whose name was not known to me at the time) simply takes my breath away. I actually have a hard time concentrating on what’s happening in the movie (it’s not like I don’t know the plot anyway) because I’m trying to find Kili in each scene, and barring Kili, Fili will do. Yes, I’m definitely in love.

10. I decided I’ll just make a quick check on what kind of fics I can find that have Kili in them. I never read much LOTR fics (maybe five ever), but Hobbit feels somehow different (and hello, I’m in love!). And BAM, durincest comes on my screen, and YEAH! I didn’t even have any feelings of shame, because Wincest had already erased them, so I just plunged in. And here I am, end of story.

P.S. By the way, there is nothing relaxing in the FiKi ship. It’s about as sad and as angsty a ship as you can get. And I love it.

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Liekinloimu

October 2020

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Page Summary

Dear Yuletide Author,
About the ages of dwarves
If wishes were horses…clothes would lose your fat for you
Things that bug me in (slash) fanfics – about antifeminism and misogyny
Thoughts of original characters in fanfiction
Random thought, still applies
10 practises to avoid if you want me to read your fanfic
LJ finally crossed the line
Thoughts on my writing fandoms
About fandoms and ships
(no subject)
Random fandom observation
Not really very important stuff, but…
Ten facts about how/why I got into fandoms

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Snaps and snails, and puppy-dogs' tails

Recent Entries

Dear Yuletide Author,

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About the ages of dwarves

If wishes were horses…clothes would lose your fat for you

Things that bug me in (slash) fanfics – about antifeminism and misogyny

Thoughts of original characters in fanfiction

Random thought, still applies

10 practises to avoid if you want me to read your fanfic

LJ finally crossed the line

Thoughts on my writing fandoms

About fandoms and ships

(no subject)

Random fandom observation

Not really very important stuff, but…

Ten facts about how/why I got into fandoms